


Swaggered and Swayed

by MiniNephthys



Category: Fate/stay night (Visual Novel)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-07-09
Updated: 2011-07-09
Packaged: 2017-10-21 05:16:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 4,237
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/221326
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniNephthys/pseuds/MiniNephthys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What was not, but could have been.  October 2008.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. trusting things beyond mistake

“Ah, Matou Sakura, just who I was looking for,” Issei said as they came upon each other in the hall. “Could I speak with you?”

Sakura blinked. “Ah? Of course, Ryudo-sempai.” They stepped inside an empty classroom for privacy.

The student council president began bluntly. “I saw - as did half of the school, I’m sure - that display this morning. I can get Matou expelled for that, and probably reported to the police, but only if you report it officially.”

She shook her head. “That’s not necessary.”

“…I see. I thought you might say something like that, but…” He sighed. “It’s killing the teachers who know about it not to interfere. School policy prevents them from doing anything that the wronged party doesn’t want them to do. And… may I be frank?”

“Of course,” she answered.

“To be frank, I don’t think that Matou will ever change. If you keep letting him get away with this, he’s never going to stop. And I don’t want that to happen to y- anyone,” he corrected hastily.

“It’s okay, Ryudo-sempai. Niisan is like that, so I’m used to it,” Sakura assured him.

His frown only deepened. “Ha… That only makes me feel worse. You really do not deserve a brother like him.”

“Thank you,” she answered lightly, stepping back outside the room. “But I’m going to be late for class.”

Issei watched her go, then pressed his head against the wall. “I didn’t do that right, did I?”


	2. to us your ghost is born

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Shirou finds a girlfriend, Issei runs into Archer.

As he walked through the streets, Issei reminded himself for the hundredth time that he was absolutely not jealous.

Matou had been there first, hadn’t she? And Emiya looked happy with her. That was the most important thing. He couldn’t expect his friend to remain a bachelor for the rest of his life just for his sake, after all, even-

Whumph.

Issei rubbed his head and began to apologize. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t watching where I was going-” He looked up. “…haven’t I seen you before…?”

The tall, dark, and - don’t finish that thought, Issei told himself - man frowned at him. “No, I don’t think so.”

“That’s strange. I’m usually better about these things… I must be distracted today,” Issei mumbled. He bowed low. “I apologize once again.”

“It’s fine,” the man answered curtly, before turning and walking away.

…He _had_ been distracted, but Issei still couldn’t shake the feeling that this wasn’t their first meeting.  


* * *

  
Their not-second meeting was on that same road.

“I never found out your name,” Issei said, slowing to a stop beside the man.

He raised an eyebrow. “Do you ask everyone you run into what their name is?”

“This is our second meeting within a week,” Issei pointed out. “Don’t you think that there might be some greater reason for all this? I inexplicably feel like I ought to get to know you better.”

The man still looked doubtful as Issei bowed again. “My name is Issei Ryudo, and I am honored to make your acquaintance,” he said.

“…Archer.”  


* * *

  
Their later meetings were numerous, and Issei asked him questions.

Archer was a distant relative of Emiya, which somewhat explained why Issei had thought he’d known him. Somewhat. He lived in Fuyuki City about ten years ago before moving away, he had only recently returned, and he made the best tea that Issei had ever tasted.

He was living with Tohsaka. No, he would not move out. No, Tohsaka was not a witch. No, Tohsaka had not enslaved him into doing her bidding. No, Tohsaka was not blackmailing him into anything. Yes, Tohsaka was completely human.

No, Emiya hadn’t mentioned Issei before. And then, hastily added after seeing Issei’s expression: because they weren’t on speaking terms. Issei was sorry to hear that.

Yes, this really was only their fourth, fifth, sixth meeting. Yes, it felt like more for him too.  


* * *

  
Emiya’s bouts of protectiveness were both irritating and pleasing, even if Issei knew that he was just being a friend.

“I’m sorry about him,” Issei said, turning back to Archer. “He’s always like this - I guess you would know better than me.” Archer didn’t answer. “He’s stupid about it at times, but it’s one of the things I admire about him.”

Archer asked, “If that changed about him, would you still-” ‘Be in love with him’ went unsaid. Issei still thought that it wasn’t obvious. “-admire him?”

Issei didn’t need to think. For some reason, knowing Archer convinced him of it, even if they had nothing to do with each other. “Of course. Emiya is Emiya. No matter what happens to him - if he learns to turn people down, if he isn’t as naïve - I will still-” Adore. “-admire him.”

“…I’m not surprised.”  


* * *

  
 _Truth be told, that memory is not one that he would have remembered if it had not come so close to his death. If that had not been the last time he saw him, it would have been more vague, indistinct. Like those times that he warned him against being so selfless - words he wishes he’d taken to heart - he cannot remember any of that clearly. But this remains._

 _Issei fidgeting, stalling for time with idle conversation - “I guess neither of us look anything like we did ten years ago, do we?” So many false starts that it’s a wonder that he ever manages to say, “I like you, Emiya.”_

 _The high-school vernacular seems so out of place there that it takes him a minute to remember what it means._

 _“…I’m sorry, Issei. I don’t…”_

 _“I know.” He wonders how Issei can manage to smile. “As long as you’re happy with someone, I’m happy.”_


	3. all of my powers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Issei creates a friendship with the guard on his doorstep.

That man had shown up guarding their doorstep a little after Kuzuki and his new wife’s wedding. He claimed to have been there all along, but only now had he been given permission to appear.

Issei thought that that made sense. It would have been suspicious for Medea to bring an armed guard along when everyone from the temple hardly knew her.

…The man having hidden outside the temple for weeks without his noticing made less sense, but far be it from him to question a guard’s skills.

The man’s name was Sasaki.

“Like the swordsman?” Issei asked.

Sasaki nodded, wearing a smile that said _if only you knew_.  


* * *

  
“Don’t take this as an insult,” Issei said, “because it isn’t - but I don’t see how one could adequately guard against the weapons of this day and age with just a sword.”

“If one is sufficiently skilled in it,” Sasaki answered, “it matters not what your weapon is. And you may find that you need to be guarded against the weapons of this day and age less than you expected.”

Issei shrugged. “I suppose you’d know more about this sort of thing than I would. It’s a beautiful weapon,” he added. “I’d like to see you use it one day.”  


* * *

  
Sasaki moved fluidly, slashing and cutting at the air and shifting into his next position without pausing. His sword glittered, light reflecting on it differently with every strike. The afternoon was nearly silent as he performed a dance of the oldest sort.

Finally, he turned to his still-enraptured audience and bowed low.

“That…” While Sasaki straightened, Issei took a moment to catch his breath. “That was _amazing_.”

“I am glad to hear it,” the swordsman replied. “Few people appreciate the majesty of these weapons now.”

“They have no idea what they were missing. That was… you were…” Issei trailed off, but Sasaki could just barely see his lips form the word ‘beautiful’.

“Oh? So forward, now?”

“B-Be quiet, I didn’t mean it like _that_!”  


* * *

  
“Sasaki?” Issei called out, only to whirl around when he was tapped on the shoulder. “Gah! Must you really do that every time I want to speak to you!?”

“Perhaps your reaction has something to do with it,” Sasaki replied. “Now, then. What did you require of me?”

Issei looked away, fury forgotten in the face of embarrassment. “I… well… There’s a festival centered on the Shengoku period coming up, and I was wondering if you would want to go. It seemed like it would be nostalgic for you.”

Sasaki raised an eyebrow and asked, “Why would that be so?”

Looking up, Issei gave his friend a thin smile. “It’s not ‘like’ the swordsman, is it?”

“…No, I suppose it is not,” Sasaki Kojiro admitted, making a mental note to ask Caster about what to do about… this. He didn’t yet know about the Grail War, which was the important thing…

“So. The festival?” Issei repeated, looking entirely unfazed by the revelation that his temple guard was a four-hundred-year-old swordsman.

“I do not believe I can leave the temple at that time,” Sasaki said truthfully.

“…When you say that, do you mean you physically can’t leave?” Issei asked. At Sasaki’s surprised look, he added, “I didn’t give you a time or a date, so you shouldn’t know whether you could leave or not. Besides, if Sasaki Kojiro is on my doorstep, him not being able to leave doesn’t seem too farfetched, comparatively.”

Sasaki sighed. “That is correct. I cannot leave my post.”

Issei was silent as he descended a few steps. Then he turned back to Sasaki and extended a hand.

“Have you tried?”


	4. I can't explain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Issei wonders if Shirou is quite himself.

“I don’t know how to phrase this,” Issei began, “but have either of you noticed anything… strange about Emiya lately?”

Archer and Rin looked at each other, each thinking _how much does he know_? “Nothing in particular,” Archer answered. “Why, have you?”

“No! If you haven’t seen it, then I must just be imagining it, or something,” Issei mumbled.

“What exactly are you imagining?” Rin asked. “It would help if we knew what to look for.”

“…” Issei sighed. “It’s really not very much. Things like… he’ll blush a little when I compliment him, and I know he only does that when girls compliment him. And he’ll actually notice when I say something-” He cut off sharply, a blush tinting his cheeks.

Choosing not to think about what Issei said that Shirou noticed, Archer replied, “We’ll look into it.”

“Thank you. And, ah…” Issei’s flush darkened as he continued, “If there _is_ something wrong with him, could you not fix him until after this weekend? I would appreciate it.”

Rin raised an eyebrow. “…You have a date with him, don’t you?” she asked.

“N-n-n-no!” he stammered out. “Why would you - I would never - so what if I do?!”


	5. my best friend is bit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Issei asks Shirou out and Shirou accepts.

“Emiya,” Issei intoned, bowing so low that his head nearly touched the floor (effectively hiding his faint blush), “I would be honored if you would accompany me to the festival this evening.”

Shirou blinked, wondering why his friend was being so formal all of a sudden. “Okay.”

“‘Okay’?” Issei echoed, straightening up. “That’s all? You aren’t asking why I want to go with you or what’s gotten into me or anything?”

“Not really.” Shirou shrugged and smiled foolishly at his friend. “It sounds like fun.”

“…Well,” Issei said to himself. “That was a lot of panic and worry for nothing…”  


* * *

  
The festival had not merely “sounded” like fun. When Issei and Shirou left, it was a good deal later than they’d planned to and with great reluctance.

Now they stood at the base of the stairs of Ryudoji.

Issei fidgeted nervously before beginning to speak. “I quite enjoyed my evening, Emiya. Could we do this again sometime?” he asked.

“Sure,” Shirou agreed, still not understanding Issei’s nervousness at all. “Just tell me when you want to do something.”

“I will, Emiya.”

Then he leaned forward and pecked Shirou on the lips.

Shirou gaped openly, struggling for a few moments before he was able to squawk out, “ _I-Issei!?_ ”

Now it was Issei’s turn to look confused. “What? That shouldn’t be _that_ much of a supri… oh. I knew it was too easy.” He cleared his throat, his blush obvious even in the poor light of the streets. “You thought this was a friendly outing, didn’t you? I apologize for not making it clearer that I intended for it to be a… a date.”

“A… date.” Shirou struggled to wrap his mind around the concept.

His good mood now gone, Issei bowed. “Please accept my apologies, Emiya.”

Shirou stared down at him. “N-no, that’s okay… If it makes you feel any better, Issei, I would’ve been just as surprised if you’d been a girl who invited me out and then kissed me.”

Issei chuckled. “I… suppose that means we won’t be doing this again, after all,” he said quietly.

Shirou paused, looking thoughtful. “…I didn’t say that.”


	6. thinking outrageously

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Issei crushes on Saber hard.

“If there’s anything I can do to welcome you to Fuyuki City, please let me know,” Issei said.

“That will not be necessary,” Saber answered. “But thank you.”

“It’s no problem,” he replied. “And let me know if Emiya gives you any trouble. He has his heart in the right place, but he doesn’t do well around women. …Th-though I suppose I’m not one to talk…” he added under his breath, without taking his enraptured gaze away from Saber’s face.

Shirou raised an eyebrow. “What was that last bit?”

Issei blinked and quickly said, “I didn’t say anything. Ah, Saber, that’s another thing. Please take care of Emiya for me. He doesn’t care about himself, so someone else has to look after him.”

“I will,” she solemnly swore.

He gave her a small smile rarely seen by anyone other than Shirou or his family members. “Good. I trust you.”

“And in return, will you assist him when he is at school?” Saber asked. “I cannot accompany him there.”

He nodded without even having to think about it. “If he ever comes back to school, that is,” he added with a quiet laugh.

Shirou chuckled. “You know, Issei, it’s weird how well you’re getting along with Saber. You don’t usually like girls.”

“…That’s true, but… Saber isn’t just any girl. Kiritsugu had good taste,” Issei declared. Then he frowned. “No, that was a bad way to phrase that. I don’t want to think about him in that light… Especially considering how young Saber would have had to be at the time…”

“Me neither,” Shirou agreed, making a disturbed expression.

Saber tilted her head and asked, “What are you two talking about?”


	7. terrible sting and terrible storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Arguments apparently turn Issei on.

Rin loved a good argument. It cleared her mind and made her feel incredibly pleased with herself. She was aware that it had different effects on other people, but that wasn’t something she thought about particularly often.

It was possible that she should have.

Of all the people she knew, she argued with Issei the most. Or really, he argued with her, and she calmly put him in his place.

It was in the middle of one such argument that they both realized something. Several things, actually.

One: as sometimes happened when people argued, they were standing very close to each other. So close that their noses were almost touching.

Two: as sometimes happened when people argued, Issei was breathing heavily, heart pounding so much that she could hear it.

Three: he was also looking at her with wide eyes, as if he had never actually noticed what she looked like before. Knowing him, that was probably true.

Four: they were _still_ very close to each other.

Given all this, she really should have been less surprised when Issei muttered, “well, at least I won’t die without-” and pressed his lips to hers.

It only lasted a moment before Issei backed off, apparently having come to his senses.

An awkward silence ensued.

“Th-that shouldn’t have happened, that didn’t happen, and we will never speak of this again,” he finally said.

Still shocked, Rin could only nod in reply.

Issei made a hasty exit, but paused just before leaving the room and said thoughtfully, “…I guess you’re not poisonous, after all.”


	8. I see the wasp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Issei and Shinji argue about the gossip surrounding them.

There was a curious state between fact and rumor where most high school myths lay. They were too widespread to be mere gossip, but based on too flimsy evidence to be proven true.

One such belief, held by everyone who was not named Emiya Shirou, was that Ryudo Issei was the gayest person in the entire high school.

Another such belief, held by everyone who was not a woman or named Emiya Shirou, was that Matou Shinji was a bastard - all the faults and evils of the human race wrapped up in one unassuming package. (Rumors at Fuyuki High School tended to be a bit exaggerated.)

Naturally, these two came to a head.

Ryudo Issei and Matou Shinji stared each other down as the remaining students filed out past them.

“Is there something you’d like to say, Matou?” Issei asked calmly.

“Stop monopolizing Emiya’s time,” Shinji answered bluntly. “He should be doing his duties for the archery club, not working for you.”

“Really? I was under the impression that he was no longer part of the archery club, not since you drove him out. Isn’t it his business what he chooses to do with his time?” the student council president replied.

Shinji smiled thinly. “But he’s not a student council member either, is he? So why would he spend all his time with you?”

Issei shrugged. “You would have to ask him. Perhaps he prefers fixing appliances to routine cleaning, or perhaps he just would prefer not to see you.”

The archery club’s vice-captain’s eyes narrowed. “Oh? You’re saying he prefers your company to mine, oh Hermit of Fuyuki High?”

“If you were going to pick one of the insulting nicknames for me, that was probably the least effective one you could have chosen,” Issei advised him. “And it’s possible. Clinginess tends to drive away some people, after all.”

Shinji’s smile disappeared completely. “Cl-clinginess!?”

“If it were any other member of the archery club who left, would you demand that they stay, or would you not care at all?” Issei wondered aloud. “You treat Emiya like dirt, yet you refuse to let him leave you. He’s the only man who genuinely likes you, and the more he likes you the worse you are on him. Really, Matou. Relationships like that are unhealthy-”

“How dare you!?” Shinji raged. “You’re one to talk! At least _I’m_ not following Emiya around like a lovesick-”

“I am not _lovesick_ ,” Issei snapped, taking a step closer to Shinji.

Shinji didn’t notice. “So you haven’t been pining over him for years? And he doesn’t even know you feel that way about him, how sad.”

“Be quiet,” Issei said, advancing another few steps. “ _Be quiet_ -”

“It must kill you to know that he’ll never feel the same way,” Shinji continued. “And even if you ever did work up the nerve to confess, he’d probably-”

Normally, one would expect that the student council president could not pin the vice-captain of the archery club against the wall.

However, this would not be taking into account the vice-captain’s fairly poor physical strength, and the fact that the student council president’s adoptive elder brother had not only trained him in basic self-defense, but also had possibly foreseen that he would need to pin someone against the wall and kiss them just to shut them up. (A lot of people were under the impression that said adoptive elder brother had foreseen everything in the next twenty years.)

Shinji had expected none of this. He also had not expected Issei to bite down on his lower lip hard enough to draw blood, or to suddenly break apart from him like he’d been burned, or to storm off angrily.

That… had gone badly.


	9. wearing three layers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Issei thinks Caster is beautiful, before she leaves and when they meet again.

The first thing that Issei thought when he saw her was that she was beautiful.

The second thing he thought was that Kuzuki had chosen wisely. His brother called her mysterious and shady, but Issei was certain that she had to be a good person. It only took one sight of that shy smile she gave when thanking them for allowing her to stay, and then he would have accepted her as a sister-in-law then and there.

And he could never have hated anyone who spoke of Kuzuki with such warmth and affection. Never. Not even if they were the worst person in the world could he have hated someone who loved his brother.

They did not speak after that, but Issei caught sight of her around the temple, cleaning or drawing water from the well, and each time his first thought was that she was beautiful.

It was strange. He hadn’t thought himself preoccupied with these things before, and yet... there was no denying it.  


* * *

  
The first thing that Issei thought when he saw her, years later, was that no, no it couldn’t be her. She disappeared along with Kuzuki.

But it was her, and it was entirely ridiculous that he was running over across the shopping district. He must have looked like a fool. He must have been a fool.

“I-I’m sorry-” and it occurred to him that she may have forgotten him. They had only spoken once, after all. “I’m very sorry, but you… You were Kuzuki Souichirou’s fiancée, right? My elder brother?”

She blinked at him, startled. “I… don’t know who that is.”

“Oh…” And it was painful to know that she had forgotten the man she adored so dearly, but perhaps it was a case of mistaken identity after all. “My mistake. I’m sorry to waste your time.” He turned to leave.

“Wait.” (He could not have known this, but in her mind the gears were turning and she wondered if the sixth heaven’s feel coming so near after the fifth one and the fact that Servants did not retain their memories after each summoning meant that-) “I don’t remember… anything from longer than a few months ago, so…”

“Amnesia?” he asked. She nodded. “…hah, I should have asked you your name after all. I suppose it’s too late now.”

“I suppose, but - I was engaged?” she asked, eyes wide. “I never thought…” (After Jason, who she had killed and torn apart her own brother for - but again, he could not have known this.)

Issei smiled. “Why don’t we sit down?”  


* * *

  
“I’m afraid I don’t know much about you, since we only spoke once,” he began apologetically, “but I’ll try and remember as much as I can. First of all, you loved Kuzuki.”

She listened in rapt attention, hanging on his every word.

“He was the world to you. It was obvious in the way you looked at him, and I am absolutely certain that he loved you back just as much. It may not have been as apparent, but it was there.”

“What kind of a person was he?” she interrupted.

“He was…” Issei shook his head and smiled. “Serious, and not prone to sudden displays of emotion, but at his heart a kind person. Every word that came from him you knew to be sincere, because it was not in his nature to speak otherwise. I think he said that you two met when he found you injured out in the rain, and he tended your wounds…”

“I see…” Her tone was wistful. “I could have loved such a man. Does he - could I-?”

“…He disappeared at the same time you did. I approached you because I thought you might know his whereabouts, but…” He trailed off.

She nodded and rose to her feet. “I should be going, my-”

“Wait! I…” The unnamed woman waited for an explanation. “…you were a good person.” Shouldn’t she have known this already?

She smiled warmly at him, patting his head lightly before turning away. “Thank you.”

And the last thing he thought when he saw her was that she was beautiful.

It was fitting.


	10. wrestled and raged

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Issei and Ilya want Shirou to choose between them.

Issei and Ilya glared daggers at each other.

Shirou looked between them with a worried expression on his face. _I kind of want to say that this is a natural result of their roles…_ he thought. _But that’s weird. What does that even mean, anyway?_

Finally they turned their glares onto Shirou. “Emiya,” Issei began, “just because this girl showed up out of nowhere one day and claimed to be your sister, doesn’t mean you have to turn a blind eye to what she is! She is absolutely the most cruel, selfish little girl I’ve ever met. You can’t possibly-”

“He’s so mean to me!” Ilya sniffed, though by now Shirou could tell that the tears were fake. “And he’s keeping you from spending more time with me. You don’t really like him better than me, do you, Oniichan?”

“You don’t really prefer this girl’s company to mine, do you, Emiya?” Issei demanded.

Shirou shook his head frantically. “That’s not true. I like you both the same,” he said, hoping to appease them. “Okay?”

Both of them were silent for a moment.

“That’s a wussy answer, Oniichan,” Ilya said at last.

“Emiya is king of the wussy answer,” Issei noted.

“He should really stop talking like that…” she mused. “Maybe we could train him out of it?”

“It sounds like a good idea. So, shall we become business partners?” he asked, looking at Ilya with newfound respect.

“We’ll be business partners!” she agreed.

“Good. Now… _Emiya_!” Issei snapped. “From now on, state your answer clearly! Keep your chin up and shoulders set! There’s no backing down!”

Ilya joined in. “Don’t think about what the consequences will be! Speak your mind as soon as you hear the question!”

Shirou swallowed hard. _What… what have I done?_


End file.
